On my second meeting with my consultant, it was mentioned to me that the possible treatments for the kind of cancer that I had would be surgery – through the form of a hysterectomy. There was also a course of chemotherapy and potentially radiotherapy. The radiotherapy would be an intensive treatment carried out over a period of 30 to 31 days.
The surgery would be carried out in hospital and there would be a period of six to eight weeks of convalescence and recovery at home. A great deal wasn’t mentioned to me about the chemotherapy because I think at that point my consultant realised the complete look of fear and sadness and dread written all over my face.
Nothing can prepare you for that moment when you walk into the hospital, and you’re led to a chair and you see a drip, and you know that the nurse within the next five or ten minutes is going to insert a cannula into your hand and that there will be a chemotherapy agent being administered to your body.
It’s truly the most confusing, disturbing, upsetting, heartbreaking thing to go through.
My whole body just froze and I just felt this cold liquid seeping through the drip into my hand.
You have your sister or your boyfriend, somebody who loves you, who’s sat there watching it as well. And all the time you’re thinking about them and you’re thinking ‘oh my goodness are they going to be able to cope with this. Are they going to be able to sit there and watch me going through this.’ So it's horrible.
During my treatment I was able to ring up and talk to Macmillan nurses when I wanted which was really, really good for me.
I felt bombarded with information. I felt weak, tired, scared, frightened all at the same time. So to be able to pick up a phone and to ring and speak to someone in the comfort and the privacy of my own home, and to talk to someone at Macmillan about the way I was feeling was such a huge relief. It felt like such a huge burden had been taken off my shoulders, and it was such a, a massive source of support and comfort for me.