Choosing where you’ll die may depend on what you want, what help you have from family and friends and what services are available where you live. Wherever you’re cared for, the most important thing is that you get the care you need and your symptoms are well controlled. This can happen in a variety of places. Most people would prefer to die at home, as long as they know they will have good quality care. But, even if you choose not to die at home, you can still be surrounded by people and possessions that are dear to you.
Although your wish may be to die at home, there may be a time when this changes. You may decide that you’d be more comfortable in hospital or in a hospice, where trained staff can help your carers look after you, and relieve pain and other symptoms if needed. If you’re a carer, it’s important that you don’t feel guilty if you encourage the person you’re caring for to die in a hospice, hospital or nursing home. If you have to make this decision to move them at a late stage, this shouldn’t be seen as a failure, but rather because you want to make sure that your loved one gets the expert care they need.
If you decide to go into hospital or a hospice, you and your carers may feel anxious that you might not be able to come home again. However, it’s quite usual for someone to go into hospital or a hospice for a short time, so that symptoms can be closely monitored and brought under control. Then, if you and your carers wish, you can return home.