Who can you talk to?

Even with a supportive family and a wide circle of friends it can be difficult to talk about cancer at times. You may feel very isolated and that only people who’ve experienced cancer can understand your thoughts and feelings. You may also feel disappointed by the reaction of some people who could have been more supportive to you and surprised by how supportive other people have been.

The best person to talk to is whoever you usually talk to about important issues or difficult problems. It might be anyone - your partner, your closest friend, your mother, sister, brother or a religious leader. It may even be somebody you know a bit but haven’t until now been friends with.

Often, people with cancer find it difficult to talk to close family or friends, and easier to speak to someone they don’t know. If this is your situation there are a number of groups, organisations and healthcare professionals that can help you.

Organisations Back to top

You may find it helpful to contact an organisation that runs a telephone helpline service for people with cancer. These helpline services are often run by healthcare professionals. You can contact our support line| for support and more information about other specialist helpline services.

Counselling Back to top

It can sometimes help to talk to a counsellor, especially if you feel very low and depressed. Counsellors are trained to listen and help people talk through their problems. They won’t give advice or answers, but will help you find your own answers.

Talking one-to-one with a trained counsellor in a more focused way can help you sort out your feelings and find ways of coping with them. This can be very helpful, particularly if you aren’t able to discuss your feelings and emotions with people close to you. You may need to pay for counselling.

Some GPs have counsellors within their practice, or they can refer you to one. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy| can give you details of counsellors in your area.

Support groups Back to top

Most areas of the UK have cancer support groups. These consist of people with cancer and are sometimes led by a healthcare professional. Other members of the group may be in a similar position to you. It’s quite usual for a group to include people with different types and stages of cancer. You may find this wider experience helps you see your own problems from a different perspective.

Our cancer support specialists can let you know about support groups in your area or you can find them here.|

Some people find groups very helpful, and they form close relationships with other members. However, other people get embarrassed or uncomfortable when talking about personal issues with strangers. If groups aren’t your style, don’t worry.

Internet support groups Back to top

If you’re an internet user, you may want to join an internet support group or chat room. There are a number of online groups for various cancers. These are easy to join and you can ‘talk’ to other people in real time. If you prefer, you can stay anonymous and just read other people’s emails or posts.

This can be very supportive, as you can find that other people have similar thoughts, emotions and experiences. It can make you feel less alone and help you learn how to cope with your treatment and live with cancer. Internet groups are easy to leave, without any need for personal contact or explanations.

Our online community| is a site where you can chat to people in our chat rooms, blog your experiences, make friends and join support groups. You can share your own thoughts and feelings, and get support from others.

‘I had someone to talk to at any time day or night … Thirty-five of us from the brain tumour thread still meet up every few months. They were a huge lifeline to me.’