My name is Ron Ailman, I was diagnosed with cancer in 2007.

I was actually devastated by the news.

I’ve heard such a lot. So many people one in three, one in five, get cancer.

I always thought I wouldn’t be one of them.

I didn’t really know if I’d see the grandchildren grow up

those kind of things mean such a lot to me, being a family man.

And all the times we’ve had at Christmas time and the happy times

I thought was being taken away from me.

My name’s Linda and I’m Ron’s wife.

Before cancer came along I was just an ordinary housewife, looking after the house,

children, my grandchildren and just doing ordinary everyday things.

Ron did all the financial decisions in the house

he dealt with all the bills, he dealt with any phone calls we had

I didn’t do anything on that side.

Ron: Going from being a working lad and my wife, coming in at night and having my tea,

to wondering what the hell was going wrong with me.

It really did put a heavy strain on our marriage

one thing she started to say to me is,

‘Look, we’re a family, we’ve always got through things together as a family

and we’ll get through this together as a family.’

Linda: When Ron became ill, obviously I tried to protect him

so I took over all the roles that he did as well as my own things -

trying to protect him. I don’t know if it was the right thing to do or not

I just didn’t want him to worry about anything else other than just getting better.

Ron: Prior to that I was the strong one, I thought, in the family

and I’d become the weakest one.

My wife seemed to go to the forefront and become the strongest one.

Linda: I haven’t been able to let go of my emotions like I should have been able to

because I’ve tried to protect all my family, my children

as well as my grandchildren. And I feel if they thought that I couldn’t cope emotionally

they would crumble.

When Ron was at his worse, when I was nursing him at the beginning

there were times when I could have screamed because sometimes he was so ungrateful for things

ordinary things that I was doing for him.

Ron: I needed to put my arm around her, I needed to kiss her, I needed to love her

because I was hurting the one I love most and she was my life.

But I found I couldn’t do it at first but the stronger we got together

the more I could go back before I said I loved her

I could put my arm around her and kiss her on the cheek

and things started to get stronger that way.

Linda: He had time to reflect on the day and think, he knew exactly what he’d done,

and how he’d made me feel so he would apologise

and he never went to sleep without kissing me and saying he was sorry,

that he didn’t mean it, and I know in my heart that he didn’t mean it.

Ron: I have a neighbour named Sue who only lives down the bottom of the cul-de-sac

and when she heard I had cancer, she broke down, put her arms around me

and kissed me and wished me all the best.

At times it was something I needed so I was really grateful for what she was doing

and how she was reacting in her way

and recently she’s just been diagnosed with breast cancer

and me and Linda went down to see her and Sue’s quite a strong girl

the strongest of the two, her and Mel.

But I noticed Mel was absolutely devastated

and I think one of the things that’s brought it home to me,

and especially now I’m stronger, is that cancer touches everybody in your family in different ways.

I think friends and family should always look at everybody in the family

and not just the patient.

I really, heart of hearts, believe

that there’s more than one person suffering.

Linda: The grandchildren have actually been my outlet, I’ve done swimming with them,

I’ve done ordinary things with my grandchildren so that’s been my escape really.

Ron: Just having my granddaughter come to hospital with me and seeing her face at the door

after I’d been for my treatment smiling, saying ‘Come on Granddad,’

did everything for me.

It made me feel good and it gave me something to hang on to

and I’ll always remember the face at the glass window.

Linda: With the experience of cancer I have become very strong.

I feel very strong emotionally, I think anything can be thrown at me now and I could cope.

Ron: At the stage I’m at now, obviously going the right way with the cancer,

I've really looked back in my life and realised how important my family and friends are to me.

It’s made me realise what life’s all about

and I now still have things to enjoy with the people who supported me in life.

New Speaker: For information, help, or if you just want to chat

call the Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00

or visit macmillan.org.uk